In the past couple of weeks, we've watched Hillary Clinton, favored pet of the globalist cabal, collapse in record time. The Leftist hydra is so inept and corrupt that it's astounding they've held on to power this long.

The title of this article is a quote from Irish revolutionary leader Michael Collins, blurted out after he heard about his niece getting a job as a secretary with a high official in the British administration while he was running an insurgency against them from the slums of Dublin. They’re the words that come to mind when I watch the screaming, arterial spray-laden Troma flick death of not just the Hillary Clinton campaign, but the globalist dream.

Basic logic dictates that people like Clinton and George Soros are intelligent, or at least competent; you don’t get to be ruler of the world without knowing what you’re doing. But the past couple of weeks have exposed the American Left as a band of boobs, Spaceballs without the charm. Everyone from the Lizard Queen herself to her nauseating courtiers in the media has the IQ of a slug and the social acuity of a hobo on bath salts.

Where do I start with this parade of inanity? Hillary’s epic fall in New York two weeks ago is good enough. On the 15th anniversary of the deadliest terror attack in American history, the chosen candidate of the neocons had a seizure while walking back to her car. Instead of taking her to the hospital, her handlers took her to her daughter’s apartment (because they’ve dealt with her major malfunctions before), while the Pravda media rushed to concoct a story for the rubes. First Hillary was overheated… on a 70 degree day. Then she had pneumonia… yet her handlers let her walk around and infect other people.

Assuming they don’t laugh themselves to death over one of the leaders of a world superpower declaring war on a cartoon frog, historians will cite Hillary’s 9/11 collapse as the turning point of not just the campaign, but the war against globalism. The symbolism of a presidential candidate having a severe seizure during the remembrance of one of America’s greatest national tragedies—not withstanding her other health problems—is too much for the government-media complex to cover up. And unsurprisingly, Hilldog’s poll numbers have tumbled since she tumbled, triggering Leftists across the nation with night terrors of a Trump presidencyCry more.

Then came the next big DNC dox drop. Two days after Hillary Dumpty took a big fall, Wikileaks and Guccifer 2.0 dumped another motherload of hacked Democratic server files online. My own investigations into the DNC leak showed evidence of insider trading, electoral fraud and elaborate gerrymandering plans, among other things, but the most moronic revelation was the DNC’s hilariously poor financial security. The Democrats had stored their donors’ credit card info in plain text, unencrypted Excel spreadsheets, meaning anyone who downloaded the leaked files could go on a shopping spree with other peoples’ money. Hey, from each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

The Left wants to blame Julian Assange’s DNC leaks on Russian hackers, when the reality is that their cybersecurity is so bad that a teenage script kiddie could break in. That’s basically what happened when a George Soros-backed PR firm tried to launch PutinTrump.com, a website designed to scare middle Americans into believing that the Donald is Moscow’s Manchurian candidate. Hours before the site was due to go live, Wikileaks and GotNews researchers broke in, screencapped all the content, and systematically debunked it. This was made possible by the fact that the password to access the site was… “putintrump.” Somebody failed Comp Sci 101.

But the mother of all short bus riders on the Hillarymobile is Paul Combetta, aka “stonetear.” Remember when FBI Director James Comey dismissed charges against Clinton because he said that she lacked the “intent” to commit national security crimes? Internet sleuths did his job for him last week and discovered Combetta, an IT toady for Hillary, had left posts on Reddit asking how to strip her name from emails—the emails she was being investigated for deleting—with direct orders from the Hildabeest herself.

The stupidity of what I just relayed to you is so wince-inducing that merely typing it out makes my eyeball twitch. Ponder the bottomless idiocy of someone asking for information on how to commit a federal crime on a publicly accessible forum. This is on the level of a balding vice cop in Doc Martens offering “marijuana cigarettes” to high schoolers. Keepin’ it real, mang! Real dumb.

Our enemies aren’t just evil degenerates: they’re stupid, evil degenerates. They’re so empty-headed and arrogant that they leave their houses unlocked, their wallets on the table and their email passwords set to “123456.” No wonder Pepe the Frog has them doubled up in conniption fits! Not only that, the incompetence of the Hillary campaign makes cuckservatives’ fifty-year failure to fight the Left even more pathetic and laughable. If you dorks weren’t so ineffectual and nice, we could have beaten these people ages ago.

Tomorrow night is the first presidential debate, which is shaping up to be the most watched television program in the U.S. all year. With Trump having made mincemeat of his GOP challengers in the primary and Hillary one expired modafinil table from another seizure, we will be heartily entertained at the very least. If the Left is going to keep self-destructing like this, then the Trumps might as well start shopping for new White House drapes.

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Matt Forney is a Chicago-based author and journalist and the host of Right On's podcast This Alt-Right Life. He blogs at MattForney.com and is also on Gab, Instagram, SoundCloud, and YouTube. He is the author of several books, including Confessions of an Online Hustler, available here. Matt's work has also been featured at Return of Kings, Taki's Magazine, Red Ice, Alternative Right and many other sites, and he formerly served as the editor of Reaxxion, a gaming website for men.